a bit behind...

I'm blogging. That's weird.

I've been MIA. Here's what you missed...

Thanksgiving happened. I started off my morning nice and early at 3:30am to direct the Thanksgiving Day Race. It went awesome. It was our largest race to date. Then I napped and had Thanksgiving dinner which was ok. I was tired and surrounded by 30+ people I barely knew. That's the sucky part of parental re-marriage. "Family time" isn't always with your family.

A few days after Thanksgiving my mom had brain surgery to remove her tumor. It was a very looong surgery. It made for a very looong day. And a very long 4 days while my mom recovered in the neuro intensive care unit at the University hospital. I cried a lot. And in case this is news to you... I didn't really tell anyone. That's how I deal when presented with stressful situations. I pretend they aren't happening. Bad I know. The surgery went awesome. They were able to remove all of the tumor. The tumor was benign. And my mom's recovery has been stellar. She goes back to work next week.

Then came christmas and Izzie was spoiled rotten by her grandparents. In fact, her two favorite toys she got this year were from them. She takes her baby and her "meows" (kitties) every where she goes. She is the best little "mommy". She feeds her baby, changes its diapers, puts her down for naps, etc... She will make a great big sister! One day... ONE DAY. Definitely not an announcement.

We spent New Years Eve with friends. Lot's of laughs, games and inside jokes.

And here we are in 2013. Troy's graduation year. FINALLY. Granted he doesn't graduate until December but I'm sure it will be upon sooner than we think. Don't years just get faster and faster?

Izzie turns TWO next week. Seriously? Well here is a video of Izzie rocking it out with her baby to Guitar Hero for your viewing pleasure.

Is this Real Life?

Last Saturday one of those scary life things happened. I was at work going through the storage room (aka the dungeon) and had no cell service. When I surfaced from the dungeon my phone beeped that I had a voicemail. I was busy setting up stuff for work so I didn't really think much of it. I kept thinking I should check my voicemail. Even though I HATE voicemails. Really, please don't leave me one. I usually never check it for weeks.

It was a voicemail from my mom's husband Blair telling me that my mom was taken to the Emergency Room at Riverton Hospital.

On Saturday my mom got a migraine so severe that it messed with her frontal lobe and caused her to lose her short term memory. She couldn't keep facts straight or anything. My mom's husband took her to instacare where they immediately told her she needed to go to the hospital. She was admitted to the emergency room immediately and was given a CT scan to check for possible stroke.

Luckily, there was no sign of stroke but they found some abnormalities in her blood vessels. So the doctor decided to proceed with an MRI. The MRI showed that there was deterioration in blood vessels to her brain. The MRI also revealed a small mass in her brain stem. She had to be transferred to a larger hospital that had neurologists on staff. After being admitted to St. Mark's hospital she was kept over night for observation. In the morning her short term memory had returned. But she didn't remember much of Saturday except Blair leaving for work and then waking up at the hospital wondering how she got there.

She met with a neurologist who informed her that the medication she had been taking was restricting blood flow to her brain and had caused her severe migraine and memory loss. He prescribed her new medications, physical therapy for her neck (from a previous injury) and recommended a neurosurgeon specializing in that particular part in the brain. She was sent home that night. And has made a 100% rebound. My mom has already submitted her CT scans and MRI results to the University of Utah neurology department and she should be hearing back from them within the next week or so.

As much as it should make me angry that doctors can prescribe medicine that restricts blood flow to a persons brain. I'm so grateful that it happened. Without this horrible reaction occuring, my mom may never have found out about this tumor until it was too late. Fortunately, the doctors are saying this is a very slow growing tumor.

The whole thing was pretty intense. But I felt nothing but comfort through out this whole ordeal. It's hard not worry sometimes. I just don't think I could handle being 25 and having already lost both of my parents. That's the worst part about being an only child. When you lose a parent there is no one else there dealing with it like you are. It's just you. Of course my husband would be a great support but I just don't think it would be quite the same.

My mom has such a great attitude about everything. She says she knows everything is going to be alright. Plus she has already tried to pull the "brain tumor" card on me.  I guess she figures if she can beat cervical cancer and kick ulcerative colitis in the butt (who needs a colon anyway?)... a little brain tumor is nothing, right?

I'll let you know more as I know more.

songs

I teach the 6/7 year olds in my wards Primary. This past Sunday in sharing time we were practicing for the Primary Program that is this coming Sunday. One of the songs we are singing is, "I'm Trying To Be Like Jesus". And I just about lose it every time we sing it. My kids think I'm nuts since they are bored off of their behinds from singing this song over and over. But how can you not get emotional every once in a while when listening to this sweet simple message?

I’m trying to be like Jesus;
I’m following in his ways.
I’m trying to love as he did, in all that I do and say.
At times I am tempted to make a wrong choice,
But I try to listen as the still small voice whispers,

Chorus 
“Love one another as Jesus loves you.
Try to show kindness in all that you do.
Be gentle and loving in deed and in thought,
For these are the things Jesus taught.”

I’m trying to love my neighbor;
I’m learning to serve my friends.
I watch for the day of gladness when Jesus will come again.
I try to remember the lessons he taught.
Then the Holy Spirit enters into my thoughts, saying:

Chorus 
“Love one another as Jesus loves you.
Try to show kindness in all that you do.
Be gentle and loving in deed and in thought,
For these are the things Jesus taught.”

Hair Today....

I need a change. My hair is driving me nuts. It has reached hippie status. It's to my waist and the ends definitely need a trim. My long hair is becoming a burden. It's constantly getting in my way and in my food. Gross. I know if I cut it I will be sad because it's looong and taken me awhile to get this looong. But I need CHANGE people! CHANGE!! So What should I do?....

I know this isn't the most flattering picture of me. However, I entered a contest to win a makeover and I needed a picture where I didn't look fabulous but not so hideous that I didn't show potential... I feel like this picture says both? Maybe? Or maybe it just says "scary". You choose.

Maybe I should keep my hair long but put more layers and add some bangs like this....

Or perhaps this medium length....

or maybe I can get some serious guts and just chop it all off...

Tell me what I should do. one, two, three.... GO!

Thoughts on a Thursday

The debate. I watched and I loved it. I don't know why but I love politics lately. I hate how stupid it makes people on Facebook though. I hate how disrespectful people can be when it comes to opinions.

I think sheets have an average life span of just over 3 years. Troy and I have only owned 2 pairs of sheets that we were given to us when we were married. Both have become thread bare and holey in the last month. Or maybe we're just really rough with our sheets? Now that didn't sound awkward at all....

I think that grasshoppers and praying mantis are two of the scariest bugs on earth (right after spiders). Both of which have been in my yard lately. A praying mantis was actually trying to climb on my foot yesterday and I screamed and ran inside.

If you are laughing at me, seriously, think about it. Grasshoppers can land on you at any moment and jump REALLY far. Praying Mantis are just evil.

I want to play a "walker" on the tv show The Walking Dead. That would be fantastic.

Speaking of, I am so excited for season 3! Too bad I no longer have cable.

I really wish it were a year from now.

How excited are you for Halloween? Can I get a whoop whoop!?

And.....

That's all I got.

Lame post signing off.

mindless musings

I absolutely hate shredding cheese. It is such a hassle. I also happen to loathe the saw dusty grossness of pre-shredded cheese. It is a conundrum.

I have learned to never get too comfortable as a mother. I thought we had moved out of the diaper blow out days. Until tonight when Izzie and I were snuggling on the couch watching Monsters Inc. and she happened to have EXPLOSIVE diarrhea all.over.me.

The other night I had a dream that I had quadruplets (3 girls, 1 boy) and I was trying to figure out how to breastfeed them all. Waking up from a dream never felt so good.

Izzie's new favorite word is "ummmm". It's kind of hilarious to hear her use it correctly.

I swear everyone and their dog just announced they are expecting baby number 2.

Speaking of baby number 2 everyone keeps asking me when we will have another baby. Especially the daycare ladies at work. I will have another one when the thought of having 2 kids to look after doesn't cause me so much stress my eye balls want to explode.

Good news for those of you who know about my "problem".... I think it's finally fixed! woot woot!

is there anyone out there who has some free time and some good statistics skills? I need some help with a work thing.

I have a horrible addiction to chocolate ice cream with peanut butter milk shakes. It was a habit I started when I was running regularly. Then my jogging strollers tire blew out so I stopped running. But I keep devouring milk shakes. I think you can guess how this could turn out.

Someone please come fix the tire on my jogging stroller before I have to be rolled out of the house.

Some time in the very near future I am going to attempt my very first pot roast. I am excited!  I don't have a pot roast recipe so feel free to share them with me.

I think I finally figured out what I want to be when I "grow up" but I'm not going to share it with you just yet. Just in case I change my mind.

I shall sign off with a quote from one of my favorite movies Julie & Julia...

"What is it that you really like to do?"
"Eat."

Gratitude

To put it lightly I have been a little ungrateful lately. 

Why? 

Why me?

Why this?

Why that?

I don't have enough.

All of these words had become regular thoughts in my head.

These thoughts left me feeling irritable, grumpy, depressed and tired.

My prayers had become nothing more than a mindless recital.

That is, if I even decided to pray that day. 

But I kept getting this nagging feeling. 

you know the one...

that little voice, that whisper

pray

just pray about it

Yesterday, I gave in. I prayed. I told God every selfish thought I had. 

I gave him my worries, my concerns.

I told him how helpless I felt.

And then I went to work and didn't think anything of it for the rest of the day.

Today however, I noticed something different.

Today was no different than any other day, 

But as I sat and watched Izzie play with her sidewalk chalk,

 I realized how much I enjoy my life. 

Honestly, I can't even describe to you the emotions that over came me as I played tic tac toe by myself and Izzie scribbled on the patio furniture. 

I feel so blessed that I am able to stay home with Izzie the majority of the day.

I know that if I worked more it would take away a lot of financial stress,

But I love knowing that I'm the one who taught her what a cow says.

I taught her how to lick sauce off of her fingers

I taught her how to say "shoes".

I have been blessed with so much.

I have a fantastic husband, a beautiful healthy daughter, a roof over my head, clothes on my back and food in my cupboards.

What more do I need?